As grateful as I am for a healthy marriage, two small children, and a career as a speech and language pathologist, it’s hard not to feel defeated. I know what a flare could mean for my immediate future: a middle-of-the-night run to the emergency room. A weeks-long hospital stay. I’ve taken meds. I’ve had surgery to remove my bowels. I’ve been given IVs, and I remember the poking, the prodding. But as disheartened as I feel, the one thing that always stands true — that helps me face every flare — is that I always make it through. With every flare, I dig a bit deeper and love myself a little more. I learn how to work my way through it. And what I’ve learned is this: You can’t skip a flare, as much as you may want to. You just have to feel all the feels that come with it. Take it from me: The sooner you accept your feelings, the faster you will heal. But the harder you fight it — the more you resist, the longer you hold in all that anger and frustration — the sicker you will feel. Beating a flare takes work and, above all, self-love. Here are a few things I do to cope with my emotions during a flare that may work for you. 2. Meditate. It’s hard for me to do silent meditation when I’m in a flare, so I use guided meditation instead. I find a comfortable spot to sit and focus on my breathing. And I mean, I really focus. I take deep, bottom-of-my-gut-and-all-the-way-up-to-my-chest kind of breaths. I do two to four 5-minute meditations throughout the day, usually while lying in bed. 3. Do some light exercise. If I can, I go for a walk. If my flare is so bad that I can’t get out of bed, I don’t worry. On days when I can’t walk, I do some gentle bed yoga. (YouTube it. It’s a thing.) Sometimes, the only movement I get is walking to the bathroom, hunched over in pain. But that’s okay too. Baby steps. Never forget that a flare is temporary. When you’re in the middle of it, it may feel like it will last forever. But remember that it won’t. After I work on the emotional aspect of the flare, I’m ready to tackle my physical symptoms. Here’s what I do to heal. 4. Sip on bone broth. When I don’t have the energy to make my own bone broth, I buy it in the freezer section of my local grocery store. On days when I have more energy, I boil some gut-friendly vegetables, such as butternut squash, zucchini, and carrots, and blend them in the broth to add some consistency and extra calories. 5. Drink tea. I stick to soothing flavors, such as chamomile, nettle, lemon balm, peppermint, ginger, and turmeric. I add honey and a scoop of collagen. 6. Load up on probiotics. I increase my intake of “good” bacteria during a flare, which seems to help me heal faster. (First, ask your doctor if you can take probiotics safely.) 7. Try to sleep. Our bodies need sleep to heal. It’s hard to find time to sleep even when I’m not in a flare, but if I don’t take care of myself now, I could end up in the hospital — and then I really won’t be able to work or take care of my house or children. 8. Use a bidet and baby cream. ’Nuff said. No one likes to talk about this, but I happily will: During a flare, there will be endless runs to the bathroom, and that can leave my bum a bit raw. One way to deal with the pain is using a thick barrier-like baby cream (I have no shame and steal some from my daughter) after using water to clean myself instead of dry toilet paper. I tap dry and put on that cream. 9. Drink lots of water. Dehydration can really kick you in the butt (no pun intended). Coconut water (if you can tolerate it) is a great natural source of electrolytes and minerals. 10. Wear comfortable clothing. The athleisure trend is having a moment, but I like to go even cozier: clothing that doesn’t put any pressure on my gut, such as loose PJs or an extra-large T-shirt. 11. Use a heating pad. I love my heating pad; it soothes my stomachaches like nothing else. When I’m resting in bed, I put the heating pad on my belly, over my (comfortable) clothing. 12. Watch feel-good entertainment. During a flare, I always watch something light or happy. I don’t want to add to my stress with a scary or suspenseful movie or TV show. Same goes for music: I listen to music or podcasts that inspire and motivate me, not ones that depress me and make me feel down. I also know that a flare can be different for everyone. Sometimes, flares even vary from one month to the next: There’s the one that will land you in the hospital for weeks to the one that makes your gut ache but still allows you to go about your day — however painful that might be. Regardless of the intensity or type of flare you’re experiencing, I hope these tips can help you cope with your symptoms. Sending love to all your bellies.
